The Awkward Human Survival Guide Retired

The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide answers the uncomfortable questions everyone encounters on an unfortunately regular basis and talks to people around the world who embrace the stranger side of life.

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Hosted by Adam Dachis, Darren Herczeg, Erica Elson, and Richard Cardenas.

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27: Deficient in Vitamin U

September 16, 2014 at 1:00PM • 1 hour 15 minutes • Wiki Entry

This week on the podcast we help a roommate solve a dispute with a hate-fueled neat freak, teach a college kid how to masturbate in the dorms, and learn about a new sex toy that literally fits like a glove.

Show Notes & Links Presented by CacheFly

Awkward Situation of the Week: Adam pays Allison, Rachel, and Erica to hit on guys with the worst pickup lines they can come up with.

This Week's Questions:

  • Jen asks, "I'm 24, heterosexual. My awkward situation happens to be with my roommates. They're an engaged young couple. I've been living with them for a little over a year now. I moved in with them when I moved into San Francisco. This is my first time living on my own and supporting myself. Anyway, the situation. The woman is very loud and aggressive...all the time. I get home and it's like she's constantly angry. She's literally talking about how various people are 'bitches' or 'pussies' or 'assholes' or 'fuckers' - all the time. She obsessively cleans the apartment and generally seems very possessive and territorial. We've had issues many times that we've had to resolve via 'house meetings.' These are almost always focused on kitchen related things. I'm generally very clean as well, but I do forget dishes. Anyway, her last issue was when I finally snapped a little. She texted me saying I had forgotten to push in a chair...meaning I hadn't pushed a chair back beneath our dining room table. She said that by doing this I was communicating 'fuck you' to her. It blows my mind. She tried to have another house meeting with me the other day, but I blew it off. The idea of trying to resolve anything with her, just makes me sick to my stomach. She just seems completely irrational. Help is appreciated, thank you!"
  • Anonymous (Male) asks, "Hello, Comrades in Awkwardness, I just started college and I am living in my school's dorms. I have a roommate in my dorm, and he's great, but I want to masturbate and I need a way to do so without him walking in or me (or ideally not knowing I'm doing it at all). How do I get the relief I need? If this helps or clarifies anything, I am a straight man and I like to get off a few times a week."
  • Patricia asks, "What is the proper etiquette when someone starts to breastfeed her child in the seat next to you on an airplane? I mean, how to ask them to stop doing it and take it somewhere private? I'm a mother and I think motherhood is a beautiful thing, but I don't want someone else's breast milk that close to me and maybe squirting on me during a flight."

Special Segment: Interview with Steve Scrase, creator of The GLOV.

Final Thoughts: Always listen to the very end of the episode, because there might be a surprise!