The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide answers the uncomfortable questions everyone encounters on an unfortunately regular basis and talks to people around the world who embrace the stranger side of life.

Got a question or comment? Visit awkwardhuman.com/ask for lots of options! Check out our Subreddit, too!

**NSFW**

Hosted by Adam Dachis, Darren Herczeg, Erica Elson, and Richard Cardenas.



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32: Geriatric Voyeurism

October 21, 2014 at 2:00PM • 1 hour 2 minutes • Wiki Entry

This week we're talking about where homosexuals should live, how to cope with geriatric voyeurism, and loving a married man.




Show Notes & Links Presented by CacheFly

Awkward Situation of the Week: Andy's aggressive self-promotion and the possibility of a jokester sending in questions (that we thoroughly enjoy).

This Week's Questions:

  • Saheda (23/SF) asks, "I am a 23 year old girl and am in love with a married man. I was a virgin before we made love for the first time. I know he will never marry me. My heart wants his marriage to end, but I know that is wrong. I feel so stupid. I don't know what to do. The feelings will not go away, and he wishes to continue to see me. I know I should end this affair, but how do I do this?"
  • Brandon (19/SM) asks, "My ex-girlfriend (of 1.5 years) dumped me because I cheated on her. I want to get her back but is that even possible? NO, I did NOT have sex with the other girl!! But she feels like I cheated on her anyway. What happened is I hung out with this girl who lives four blocks away and we used to be in the after school program together. Last time I saw her I was 11. So we got lunch and I hugged her after and my girlfriend's friend saw us and told her. We went to my place later and got high and I don't really remember why but she wanted to watch me jerk off so I let her. I know that was bad but it really wasn't to cheat. I didn't think of it like a sex thing. But my ex-girlfriend doesn't even know that part. She's just butt hurt cause I went to lunch with this girl and didn't tell her and so she dumped me. I love her and she is the girl I want in my life so how do I get her back?"
  • Anonymous asks, "Where's the best place to be gay? Like if I want to be a big fuckin' faggot where should I live?"
  • Anonymous (37/BM) asks, "Is it unethical to volunteer in a nursing home if I am sexually attracted to older men and women? I get hard sitting outside in my car thinking about it. I want to be around them and then go home and jack it, or maybe in the bathroom if I have to. Except that is potentially poor work conduct and I don't want to make anybody uncomfortable or think I am there to rape somebody's grandparents. Actually my most real and present fear is that I will pop a woody while working. I think if I just pushed wheelchairs or read books to them or even fed them it would be easy to hide, but what about other times? So should I do this, or is it too much risk for someone like myself? Even if there is some risk I believe you cannot achieve your dreams without it. I know my dream is unusual and you are probably laughing at me, but I cannot connect sexually with others in another manner. I am 37 going on 40 and I have explored my sexuality. I never enjoy sexual activity with people of my own age group. I do not like younger men and women. I enjoy the company of the elderly, and I enjoy it voyeuristically. So please tell me how I can make this work in a way that is safe for all involved. Thank you."

Special Segment: Interview with Gran'ma Marta.

Final Thoughts: Rob writes in with an update: "DACHIS!!!! Finally getting a chance to message you on this. Great new podcast by the way, really liking it. Couple of items I wanted to throw your way...Darren + Joel (Aloha issue) = Randall. When you played Randall on the podcast, it didn't sound as similar as Darren during the Joel/Aloha explosion. I might have just been overtired when I made that association. Second, I hosted a thanksgiving once for family, and did not provide turkey. Not because I was cheap, but because I'm vegan, and when my wife and I got assigned thanksgiving dinner, I was open that people can bring turkey, but I wasn't cooking one! Loving the podcast man...I might be your oldest listener, but it's a great listen during a horrendous commute!"

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