The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide answers the uncomfortable questions everyone encounters on an unfortunately regular basis and talks to people around the world who embrace the stranger side of life.

Got a question or comment? Visit awkwardhuman.com/ask for lots of options! Check out our Subreddit, too!

**NSFW**

Hosted by Adam Dachis, Darren Herczeg, Erica Elson, and Richard Cardenas.



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30: Diabetes Depression

October 7, 2014 at 5:00PM • 1 hour 9 minutes • Wiki Entry

This week we're talking about rectal mucus, a blotchy vagina, erotic fiction. If you've got an awkward Halloween story or a story about accidentally walking in on someone having sex, tell us in a voicemail at 323-456-3345 or send it to questions@awkwardhuman.com!




Show Notes & Links Presented by CacheFly

Awkward Situation of the Week: Darren encounters an old man in a restaurant who thinks he's the touching police.

This Week's Questions:

  • Andrew asks, "I don't have an awkward situation but I do have an awkward question, specifically for Adam. Is there any way to boost my body's production of rectal mucus? I drink a lot of water and eat plenty of fiber, but sometimes those poops don't slide out as easily as they could. Is there an easy body hack for this?"
  • Ronald (Voicemail) asks, "It sounds like you have a guy on your podcast who did the honey badger video on YouTube. Who was it?"
  • Elise asks, "My boyfriend asks too many questions. It's not because he doesn't trust me or he's controlling, but he's naturally inquisitive or something. Like if I have a phone call he'll ask who it was and what we talked about. If I went to the grocery store he wants to know what I bought there. If I go to a movie he likes me to tell him about the movie. Not like just what I thought of it but like what happened. Sometimes he does this even if he's seen the movie before, because he likes hearing the story again. It's stuff like this and all the time. I feel like I should be flattered because he's *so* interested in me and what I do, but it feels like I'm dating a toddler sometimes. You know, "why why why why?" I don't even know what I want to happen. Like if I ask him to stop what if he doesn't ask me about anything ever again? But I think I'll lose it if he keeps doing it. I am a straight female, 22. My boyfriend is two years older than me."
  • Thom asks, "I was about to go down on my girlfriend and I found a red blotch on her vagina so I just started fingering her instead, like it's what I meant to do. I thought she didn't notice but then she asked why I wasn't eating her out. First I said I wasn't in the mood but we've been together for a couple of years and she knows I love eating pussy so she didn't believe me. She starts asking me if something smells weird and coming up with all this stuff and so I just tell her I saw the blotch and I was worried if it might be an STD. She says that just happens sometimes when she's shaving down there. But she's still got a bush and the blotch is to the right of it. She's told me it's not an STD for sure. I don't know if I believe her and I want to get tested, but I'm afraid if I push for that she's going to think I don't trust her. Is there a way I can find out without her knowing?"
  • Gerry asks, "How can I find a girl that's interested in writing erotic short fiction stories for me? I want to fall in love with a girl who would do that, but I don't know how to find her."

Special Segment: Interview with professional cam model Paige Runningbrooke

Final Thoughts: Nextdoor.com has some interesting updates in our neighborhood.