The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide answers the uncomfortable questions everyone encounters on an unfortunately regular basis and talks to people around the world who embrace the stranger side of life.

Got a question or comment? Visit awkwardhuman.com/ask for lots of options! Check out our Subreddit, too!

**NSFW**

Hosted by Adam Dachis, Darren Herczeg, Erica Elson, and Richard Cardenas.



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190: Thanks, AIDS

November 22, 2017 at 11:00AM • 1 hour 6 minutes • Wiki Entry

This awkward week we're talking about the stigma of depression, the unfriend zone, and orgy stories. Questions/stories/comments/whatevers? Call/text 509-AWKWARD or visit awkward.email for more options!




Show Notes & Links Presented by CacheFly

Awkward Situation of the Week: Liam's orgy gets reviewed and Adam shatters an iMac.

This Week's Questions:

  • Mattheyous asks, "Aphasia is from damage to areas of the brain. It's also really fucking frustrating! I couldn't spell aphasia without looking it up. Rosacea is really common in Scottish / English people and a skin condition. Richard. Aloha. Regards, Mattheyous"
  • Hannah (Updated, 26/PQF) asks, "Sorry for not getting back to you sooner! Honestly did not expect a reply. Wow. Right now I'm at work listening to the episode, just heard the bit about the Georgian and I'm giggling in my cubicle. I agree with Adam, it definitely sounds like an AI. A few things to clarify. I am in fact pansexual/queer and 26 years old and yes I am a cis-gender woman. I am SUPER sexual and we have all the sex and it's fucking awesome. In fact I am his first. And yeah I do use queer as an umbrella term sort of, but also just not-straight. My not-bf identifies hetero-flexible and isn't really sure about his feelings towards men. He definitely is into women though, which is handy cause that's what I am :D I really wish I had read this before and given you more information before the show! The big news is that as of Friday we are dating! So I guess my non-bf is now my bf, except we're not into labels. Re: Richard, I really didn't want to date other people. I love my housemates and it feels like family, so I guess that's the reason why I didn't move out in the past, despite the rollercoaster relationship with now-bf. Re: Adam, he is pretty sensitive, which is where the drama came from in the past. When we were unofficially together he would get super upset if I and our mutual bff "excluded" him. Re: Erica can I also just say that I love your subtle lispy speech b/c that's totally my deal too. My theory is that my tongue is just too long for my mouth ;) And yeah Adam, I didn't want to give it up if there was a possibility of more... and now there is so I'm super happy. And like the fact that he may be queer, and is tad more feminine than the norm for straight guys, is definitely part of my multi-faceted attraction to him. Over text (bc he's still in China), we clarified a bunch of things, such as both being interested in poly, especially throuples, but that that will be a discussion for later because the base relationship needs to be super strong first. We also agreed to both commit to our respective therapy to deal with our own depression issues and continue to grow as individuals. And now he sends me heart emojis every day lol. <3 <3 <3 I'll let you know what happens when I actually see him next, which won't be 'til 11/26. Yours, "Janina" (that made me lololol) Oh wait and I also wanted to touch on why I highlighted that our friends are pretty straight. They are all super awesome liberal and open-minded people, but they for the most part are not very alternative or fringe. So, they often find nontraditional or unconventional life choices uncomfortable, which can make it difficult when receiving their advice to sort out what is them just be "normy" and what is actually in tune with my experience and truth. Like, most of my friends are liberals but work in corporate, where as my now-bf and few other close friends are Burners, activists, witches, and artists. Also, I don't really use the word woke, for some reason it was just in my brain last week."
  • Anonymous asks, "So here's another one of those "how to talk to [insert person] about [instert issue]?" questions! ( To clarify, I am a high schooler. ) Lately, I've been extremely stressed out from mostly school, just like most of the other high schoolers and I've gone through many burnouts since the school year began, which was in August. I think one of the main reasons I tend to become burnout so quickly is since I do not communicate this issue. I just, stay in my room all day on my laptop, listen to music and stress about grades and my future and how I'm probably gonna end up a failure which leads to me procrastinating instead of actually doing my homework and studying. I do not feel comfortable talking to my parents about my mental issues because I feel like they may judge me and I do not want to burden my friends with more issues than they already have, so I've been thinking... a therapist might help. I like that sense of security that they're not someone you know, not someone you see daily that can judge you for your mental instability and I really think I need that. I'm tired of being in bed at night, or in the shower and suddenly just breaking down and crying my heart out and having to keep those cries quiet because I do not need my family hearing me. So, how do I talk to my parents about getting a therapist, even if it's just once to see if that's what I need? Like I said before, I do not feel comfortable talking to my parents about myself yet if I ask them about a therapist they'll immediately worry and I don't want that, I don't want my parents to worry about me. I just don't want to break down in front of my parents, I hate being seen as weak."
  • Vilde (16/PBF) asks, "Hi, Adam! So I have a question, and as it’s long.. sorry about the length and I hope this isn’t too bad English. Since I’m not from a English speaking country. So I started high school in August and I’m now in the same class as my boyfriend’s best friend. Let’s call the best friend A. He is very shy and kind of stupid when it comes to social things, but he’s nice so I became friends with him. We were friends for some time, but not very close. I was closer with this other girl, let’s call her B, and we talked about a lot of different stuff, including sex, you know, like girl-talk. Nothing detailed or anything just like in general. B is A’s girlfriend. Sooooo there’s were the trouble starts, when B told A some stuff that I had said, again which was not specifically about my current boyfriend and nothing detailed, she basically said that I had had sex. I didn’t know this until later. During this time A had really started to annoy me, like he was being mean and hurtful, but I’m pretty sure he didn’t know/understand that he was being mean, so I just didn’t want to put my energy into it. But then it kinda got too much, I had told him too many times so I decided to take a break from him and just hang out with other people. This annoyed him, so he told my boyfriend that I had told him stuff about me and my boyfriend’s sex life, which obviously was not true at all. Me and my boyfriend talked and he understood, because he knew how A often exaggerated stuff, so that was fine. Then A and I talked and he said sorry and and I said it was okay and we decided it’s okay. But I still don’t wanna be friends with him because he takes way too much energy and it’s too much drama so I kind of just avoided him the last month or so. The problem is that he doesn’t take the hint. He thinks that I still wanna be friends with him. So he comes over to my desk in the class room to talk to me, and the other night when I was at a party he asked “we’re okay, right? No hard feelings?” And I was not expecting that so I panicked and just said “yeah sure”. So should I just try to continue on avoiding him or should I talk to him and tell him that I don’t wanna be friends with him? I’m not angry with him I just don’t wanna use so much energy on him. I don’t want it to be super tense between us, since we’re in the same class. And if I’m gonna talk to him, what am I supposed to say? “I don’t wanna be friends with you, hope that’s okay and that there won’t be any tension between us, k bye”? I don’t know. This mail was a mess, sorry about that. And also I tried coming up with funny nicknames but I couldn’t. I’m not afraid to be direct and say what I think, I really just wanna avoid drama and tension in the future. Thanks for reading, keep up being hilarious :)"

Special Segment: Hi!

Final Thoughts: You're cool...right?

Related Links:

  • Play Party Testimonial: In The House of the Shining Hearts: A review of Liam's hosted play party. "I wasn’t certain what to expect when I pulled up and parked my dusty Subaru on that tranquil street. Dusk had just begun to gentle the strong Southern California sun. Immediately upon exiting my vehicle I was greeted by the bodacious and busty embrace of Miss Ashley Manta of CannaSexual. She had been waiting for me. Everyone had. Not only because, once everybody was accounted for the doors had to be locked for privacy, but also because that’s just who Ashley is. She is uniquely adapted to the career she has chosen, with her adorable smile, bright, engaging eyes and just overall loving demeanor. And it is just like her to come out and personally welcome each guest."