The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide answers the uncomfortable questions everyone encounters on an unfortunately regular basis and talks to people around the world who embrace the stranger side of life.

Got a question or comment? Visit awkwardhuman.com/ask for lots of options! Check out our Subreddit, too!

**NSFW**

Hosted by Adam Dachis, Darren Herczeg, Erica Elson, and Richard Cardenas.



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187: Moons Over My Danny

November 1, 2017 at 1:00PM • 1 hour 21 minutes • Wiki Entry

This awkward week we're talking about goat yoga, saltpeter, secret dick appointments. Questions/comments/stories/whatevers? Email/text 509-AWKWARD or visit awkward.email for more options!




Show Notes & Links Presented by CacheFly

Awkward Situation of the Week:

This Week's Questions:

  • Lucas asks, "So bananas have no seeds. Every varietal of banana is a bit of an evolution due to environment. Otherwise every yellow banana is identical, the clone the mother plant with rhizome roots. The roots run a distance underground then breech the surface to make a new plant, but is an identical clone. [The brown part] is a fungus."
  • Mathæyós asks, "Hey guys. Straight ( except when it comes to John Barrowman, maybe), 28 male. First of all: Adam, have you considered you may have misophonia? It's one of the 30 medical issues I have. You may want to look into it. Now for the question. My muscle wasting has gotten so bad that my hands nearly constantly hurt. I wear compression gloves as much as possible. They help. A bit. And masturbating makes it worse. I've deleted the bookmarks to my favorite porn and erotic stories, unsaved my favorite gonewild posts... Yet I'm still getting the urge to masturbate at least twice during the day. I can masturbate in the shower for now, but at the rate the wasting is going, I won't be able to for long. I exercise but the muscle wasting is just part of my condition and you can't really stop it. For example, I have to start using a speech to text app now because the wasting has made my voice to soft and eventually will go away. TL; DR: Is there a way to lower your sex drive with meditation or some shit other than taking saltpeter? Hope this was short enough. Tried to keep it short. :) Mathæyós"
  • Danny (SM) asks, "how do u know if the girl ur dating is a liar? shes saying things about her family like they got money but she lives in an a studio apt for humilty. or like she doesnt wear makeups but it looks like she does. she doesnt smoke neither but she smells like cigarettes. she pathological or? she says we gonna fuck soon so im saying nothing for now. jus gotta know if u think this is gonna get bad or what."
  • Gene Rodman's Bitch asks, "Heyo coworkers! Got a quick Q for you. I had a lil surgery recently where I got the funny stuff that doesn't put you under but you don't remember it sorta. My wife is driving me home and asking me about how it went which is when I try to tell her but I only remember something about dicks getting sucked. Hold your horses, fellas! I don't mean I had a blowrgy with the doc, nurses, and the ghost of Dobby the house elf. I just remember all the talk being about the sucking of dicks just not the contents. The weird part is that we got home and opened the surgery gift bag afterwards. If you dunno it's where they put the stuff for recovery with a free calendar or pen. Not gifts anybody wants or nothing. They put the calendar in there to mark your followups but there's one marked for the middle of November at 7pm that just says 'call me'. My wife calls and it's some fella that answers the phone called Gene, Gene Rodman. He says it like James Bond but in the wrong order according to my wife. He asks her if she's calling to confirm an appointment with one of his clients. She says yeah she thinks so and asks which appointment it's for. Gene says that's private information and provides her with a specific time and location. I googled the location and it is a yoga studio 25 miles from us. I bet you are as confused as I. Can you make heads or tails of what this is? I tried calling the doctor but he is out on leave for two weeks so I don't think it's a dick sucking appointment. We are very confused."

Special Segment: Interview with Kareem, owner of Laughing Frog Yoga—Los Angeles' premiere goat yoga destination!

Final Thoughts: Where you at??!