The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide answers the uncomfortable questions everyone encounters on an unfortunately regular basis and talks to people around the world who embrace the stranger side of life.

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Hosted by Adam Dachis, Darren Herczeg, Erica Elson, and Richard Cardenas.

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120: Drag for Pets

June 23, 2016 at 12:00AM • 1 hour 6 minutes • Wiki Entry

This awkward week we're talking about dying love, marital rape, and being a slut. Questions/comments/stories? Call/text 509-AWKWARD or visit

Show Notes & Links Presented by CacheFly

Awkward Situation of the Week: Toni throws up on a Star Wars bedspread before losing her virginity. Rachel shares a story of family incest and a confederate flag mishap.

This Week's Questions:

  • I<3CanaDan asks, "Thank you so much for having CanaDan on the show again and thank you so much CanaDan for recording something new and reading one of the questions. ???? Also everyone should send CanaDan $50 for whatever he wants. Thanks again! :) <---- look! No nose! Also, no this is not Rachel, just a random gay guy from the Midwest that finds CanaDan's Canadian accent absolutely adorable!"
  • Anonymous (20/SM) asks, "I saw this sweet girl in one of my lecture classes. We have nothing in common at all and we do not know each other at all either. We do not take any classes together and we are total strangers. Our worlds are totally separate and I have absolutely ZERO opportunity or excuse to say hi. But I did so anyway. I asked her a question after class and got to know her name. I also found out that we have 17 mutual friends on Facebook. What am I to do? How do I get to know her without looking or sounding like a creep? I just want to get to know her better and have somebody to talk to during lectures. What can I do?"
  • Ashton (28/SM) asks, "I've been with my girlfriend for six whole years, and whilst she's amazing I've come to realize my heart is not as in it as it should be. She really loves me, plus we live together, plus nothing is wrong really. So because there's nothing really wrong in the relationship, breaking up will come out of the blue for her. Got any advice for me?"
  • KD Riddle (SF) asks, "I have a problem with being a slut. I've slept with a lot of guys, probably more then anyone would guess. I'm always so horny. I realized I have an attraction to a guy at work, and I think he's way out of my depth. He's my close friends brother, we all work in hospital together, so I know a lot about him. They call him the hospital whore around work. But he's really fucking hot and I would love to bang him. I'm so nervous around him it's hard to flirt. I've already slept with a few other guys at work. I gave one of them a blow job in a bar and I feel like he's maybe told other guys around work. I'm young and enjoy being single. Anyways, I would definetly get with this guy and he's being a bit flirty with me. If I slept with him though, I know he'd tell all the guys at work. How should I go about showing this guy I'm interested in fucking him? I hear that I'm beautiful often, and I think I could get together with this guy. Any words of advice for me?"
  • Lisa (34/SF) asks, "I must say up front before all else that my mother is crazy and you should not assume she is the victim in this story. That is why I am writing you, because I don't know whose side to take. My mother is suing my father for emotional distress for raping her for the entirety of their 28 year marriage. She alleges all sex provided was non-consensual including my conception. We had a family dinner for Memorial Day and told my two brothers and me that our father is a rapist and she is suing him for emotional distress and physical harm during their marriage. She said she had us kids because she believes in choosing life but that she has always seen us as rape babies and could never love us the way we deserved. (She was not the best mother, that's undeniable.) For inexplicable reasons she does not want a divorce. She wants to live with him so he can witness the damage he has wrought. Throughout this last month my father has remained completely silent on the issue. He threw a decanter at the bookcase when she made her announcement but has otherwise said nothing. He is normally a very talkative man. He will not comment on the proceedings. All we've heard from him is 'your mother needs help.' I don't know if advice is in order for such a situation. I only want to make sense of this. Can you help?"

Special Segment: Interview with Leah Workman of Cushzilla, pet wig maker!

Final Thoughts: Don't whiten your teeth too much. You don't want to blind people.

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